Dear Parents:
Life can become a giant question mark as kids get closer to their senior year in high school: To which colleges should they apply?  Should they commute or stay on campus?  How will they score on the ACT test?  What career path should they choose?  Many have no idea what or where they will be going or doing in the future and often dread people's questions about the future and the pressure to have the perfect answers.

As we step out on our own, we all feel pressure to be successful and to achieve the goals we have set.  Yet the world tells us that some goals are worthier to pursue than others.  If our ultimate purpose is to gain financial success or the approval of others, then our path is clear.  But if we want to set more meaningful goals, we cannot be bound by the expectations of others.  
Meaningful success is internal and independent of others' approval.  Yet as we choose our own path, we are wise to seek the advice of trusted friends, counselors, and family members.  We can also dig deeper by asking God to help us discover what is worth pursuing so that we can give to these things our whole heart.
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Mark 4:39 (NRSV) says [Jesus]... rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, "Peace! Be still!"  Then the wind ceased, and there was a dead calm.  Psalm 46:10 also tells us to "Be still, and know that I am God." Recognizing that God is in control 

Hi Parents!
Proverbs 16:9 (CEV) SAYS "WE MAKE OUR OWN PLANS, BUT THE LORD DECIDES WHERE WE WILL GO."
Imagine you are throwing a birthday party for a friend.  You have planned it down to the last detail.  But when the time comes, your guests are enjoying a lighthearted conversation with your friend and are too engaged to stop for the activity you have planned.  Are you disappointed?  Probably at first - you spent a lot of time planning this gig.  But does it really matter?  The whole point of the game was to bring everyone together in celebration, and that aim was accomplished.  

When you gather with your Bible study or youth group, you aim to bring yourself and others closer to God.  When your ideas are not give the consideration you would like or when things don't turn out exactly the way you have planned, ask yourself: Is what's happening in this group bringing people closer to one another and to God?  If so, find joy in knowing that you are part of that movement and RE-FOCUS your attention.  How you ask?  Try the following...

Rediscover the world around you.  Notice the things that form the backdrop of your days - the rays of morning sun streaming through your bedroom window, the buds on the tree you pass on your way to school, the white clouds against a cerulean sky, the spider web on the drain spout.
Savor your food.  Don't just eat and run; slow down long enough to think about and enjoy your meal.  When was the first time you had that dish?  What foods do you like now that you didn't like as a child?
Learn something.  Children don't have time to get into a rut because they are too busy discovering new things.  Take up a new hobby or activity.  Read a new author.  Travel, if only vicariously with a travelogue.
Reward yourself.  Set a goals for the week, and decide what your reward will be for reaching it.  Anticipation is one of the best incentives and works at any age.
Talk to a child.  If you want a fresh perspective, ask a child about almost anything.  Wit, wisdom, imagination, hope, pathos - they have it all.  Don't be surprised if you are revisited by some of your own childhood thoughts.
Take downtime.  Your world won't come crashing down if you stop doing and accomplishing for a few minutes.  Relax.  Contemplate happy thoughts.  Let your imagination run wild.
Be thankful for small things.  A child can be delighted by an inexpensive gift, a chance to go outdoors, a bit of attention, or an empty swing at the park.  Think of the little things you enjoy, and give thanks.

Ask your child...
How can you re-focus on life's blessings when you're having a horrible day?

Challenge your child...
God wants a relationship with us.  This week, take the time to read your Bible, to pray throughout the day, to surround yourself with uplifting people, or to host a study group with friends.  Make your relationship with God a priority.

Prayer...
I want to focus only on you, God; but the world distracts.  Help me to look beyond the glitter and noise of this world to see what really matters.  Please help me to let go of my plans and allow your surprises to being me joy.

Dear Parents,
What comes to mind when you think of abuse?  Sex trafficking? Bruises, and pain?  Cowering beneath a raised fist?  Abuse comes in many forms and can happen in any sort of relationship.  Wealth, neighborhood, age, gender, education, culture, religion - none of these protect us from abuse.  ​Being able to recognize the signs of abuse - physical, sexual, emotional, and verbal - as well as neglect is important.  We all want to be loved and sometimes our need causes us to stay in an abusive relationship.  Many people would rather be in a broken relationship than to be alone.  Some stay because they believe that loving others means forgiving them, even when they do us harm.  But God doesn't want us to abuse ourselves by welcoming others' abuse.  

How do you know if a relationship has become abusive?  When do you stop trying to fix it and when is it time to walk away?  Teens believe they know everything about the dating scene, but it's important that parents stay involved and notice the warning signs of an abusive relationship.  

It's time to leave when you partner makes you feel unworthy.
It's time to leave when you feel as if you could be replaced at any moment by someone better.
It's time to leave when your self-worth goes down the drain.
It's time to leave when your partner crushes your dreams and your spirit.
It's time to leave when you have been hit, thrown around, punched, etc.
It's time to leave when you have been abused sexually or emotionally.

God created you wonderfully and miraculously!  God sent Christ to die for you and to redeem you.  God chooses you, calls you and nurtures the gifts within you.  In God's eyes you are precious.  You deserve someone who values you, who celebrates your uniqueness, and who is happiest when you shine.  You deserve someone who will grow with you in your relationship with God and with each other.  Ask God for patience as you search for that person.  You will not regret the wait!  Read I Corinthians 13 today.

Ask your child...
Think of people you can trust when you are in trouble.  Make a list of people you could talk to if something bad happened to you.  Do you need to find a few more trustworthy people?  

Prayer...
God, please give us the courage to ask for help and the strength to speak up when we are afraid.  We know we are safe in your love.  Amen.

Happy Monday Parents!
Most athletes have a mental toughness.  When our bodies are pushed beyond their limits, that toughness helps us handle the pressure - by staying calm and making smart decisions.  So how do we develop mental toughness in our faith?  How do we handle the pressure when our spirit is weak, when we feel as if we can't take it anymore, or when doubt tempts us to stop believing?  

Our doubts may be strong: but with God, we are stronger and our spirit is tougher.  Philippians 4:13 (NRSV) says "I can do all things through [Christ] who strengthens me."  We can push ourselves not to give up, just as we do in sports.  We can exercise our spirit by reading the word of God.  We can strengthen our faith through prayer.  If we ask God to help us overcome our fears, God will help us build confidence and spiritual toughness as we explore our doubts and questions.  Spiritual toughness comes from keeping our focus on God.  When times are hard, when the pressure is on, both our faith and our doubts can lead us to God.

Ask your child...
What turbulence in your life leaves you feeling worried, scared, or overwhelmed?  
Who or what helps you stay anchored to the Rock?
What doubts do you have about yourself? your beliefs?
When has seeking answers or exploring doubts strengthened your faith?

Challenge your child...
What habits or practices might help you develop a sturdier spiritual core, making you more balanced, strong, and flexible? 
Which of these practices come easy?  Which ones feel more strenuous?

Hope is like a firm and steady anchor for our soul.  In fact, hope reaches behind the curtain and into the most holy place.  Jesus has gone there ahead of us.  Hebrews 6:19-20 (CEV)