Hi Parents!
I hope you enjoyed a restful and refreshing Labor Day weekend with friends and family.  We had a sleepover for our six year old grandson and nephew from South Dakota.  Their boundless energy kept us hopping! From making brownies and purple cows (I found out that was ice cream and grape juice) to "play Legos with us" to building forts and race tracks had this "Gaga" worn out by Saturday night. 

It's like the picture says, "Inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened!"  I still feel 25 inside, but at times my aging body says otherwise! 

The Bible says that wisdom comes with age.  When people have lived a while, they've learned a lot.  More than likely, they've "been there, done that" and know the values and repercussions that come from a variety of circumstances.  Friendship with older adults is not confined by age.  Pursuing friendships with older people is actually wise.  Older adults are cloaked in wisdom, wise in ways we wish to be wise.  They cannot wait to pour their wisdom into us.  They are willing to talk about what they have learned, if we will only ask and listen.  The more we listen, the more we learn; and the more we learn, the wiser we become.

Psalm 92:14 says... "They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green..."  We are never too old to be used by God.  Honoring God is not restricted to young people who seem to have unlimited strength and energy.  Even in old age, many people continue to have a fresh outlook and can teach us from a lifetime of experience of serving God. 
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A person who accomplished a lot late in life was the Apostle Paul. He wrote each of his 14 letters in the New Testament from his late 40s until he was put to death at approximately age 62-65. And what about Sarah and Abraham? They became parents at 90 and 100, respectively, because God still wanted to use them.  If you think it’s too late to do something for God, think again. God isn’t confined by your age. He’s only confined by your heart and willingness to do for Him. Give your heart to him and continue working for Him.

​Challenge your teen...
Seek out an elderly friend or relative to tell you about his or her life experiences with the Lord.  Spending time with older adults may not sound cool, but it can be fun. We can always learn something new, often from the most unlikely people.  By sharing life experiences, you both may learn something.

​Prayer...
Lord, thank you for giving me loving grandparents.  Help me to live by their example, to honor them, and to make them proud of me and the way I live my life.  Amen.

I can really relate to this quote!  Some days it seems I barely get out of bed and get the cobwebs cleared before the Lord is gently reminding me again of an important truth.  We know we need his help every second of the day, it's just that we want to appear like we have our lives somewhat figured out.  The painful parts, the deep, cutting hurts, the feelings of unworthiness...  those are the parts we don't allow others to see.
Proverbs 6:16-19 gives us the list of things the Lord hates:

1. ​Haughty eyes
2. A lying tongue
3. Hands that shed innocent blood
4. A heart that devises wicked schemes
5. Feet that are quick to rush into evil
6. A false witness who pours out lies
7. A man who stirs up dissension among brothers

Sometimes we (teens and parents included) are more concerned with appearing to have life figured out than seeking God.  We need to remind ourselves that living life honestly is important, especially if we want to share our faith with others.  People don't relate to a facade of having it all together; they relate to what's actually going on inside of us: crises of faith, human struggles, feelings of unworthiness. ​We all struggle.  We all hurt.  But when we allow others to see us as human, stronger bonds are created with friends and peers, and our lives become more authentic.  We don't need to be afraid of our messy lives.  When we are vulnerable, we give others the courage to be vulnerable as well.  The choice to be real is up to us.  Although God doesn't want us to live a deceptive life, ultimately God allows us to choose how we will live.

​ASK YOUR TEEN:
Are you able to be vulnerable with friends?

​CHALLENGE YOUR TEEN:
​This week, risk begin real with someone close to you.

Hi Parents,
​There are many types of families.  Some kids live with both parents, others live with either just mom or just dad or go back and forth between their parents' homes.  Others might live with a grandparent.

​And some kids live with a foster family.  The word "foster" means to help someone (or something) grow and develop.  It also means to take care of someone's needs.  Foster parents give children a safe place to live and grow.  All kids need and deserve someone to take care of them.  Kids need a home, a place to sleep, nutritious food to eat, clothes to wear, and toys to play with.  Kids need someone to love them and someone who does not hurt or abuse them. 

In 2014, Over 415,000 children were in foster care.  Each year, approximately 22,000 youth emancipate — or "age-out"— from the foster care system when they reach age 18 or finish high school. (Some states have extended care through the ages of 20 or 21.) Youth in foster care often do not get the help they need with high school completion, employment, accessing health care, continued educational opportunities, housing and transitional living arrangements. Studies of youth who have left foster care have shown they are more likely than those in the general population to not finish high school, be unemployed, and be dependent on public assistance. Many find themselves in prison, homeless, or parents at an early age.

​In Matthew 12:48-50, Jesus points out that spiritual relationships are as binding as blood relationships.  "He replied to him, 'Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?' Pointing to his disciples, he said 'Here are my mother and my brothers.  For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.' "  He was paving the way for a new community of believers - the church - our spiritual family.  Going to live with a foster family means a lot of changes; not all of them bad ones. It can feel good for the kid to be in a calm, new place. But there are challenges, too. It may be tough getting adjusted to foster parents and the rules they have at their house. There may be other children in the family to get to know. But Jesus reminds us that ties to spiritual family are stronger than blood ties.  Let us begin to see every person as a brother or sister and to recognize the bond we have as the body of Christ.

​ACT ON IT: Encourage your teen to meet new kids at school.
JOURNAL: Write about your family, whether or not you all live under the same roof.  Give thanks for the ways God is working in your lives.

​PRAY:  Ask God's blessing on foster children everywhere.

It's the beginning of another school year.  For some, it's exciting!  For others, it can make their stomach churn.  We all want to have friends, to be liked by others, and to feel significant.  We place importance on how many followers we have on Instagram or Twitter and how many friends we have on Facebook - indicators of how well we are fitting in.  We may think that we are the only people who feel left out, but everyone has the desire to be cherished and loved by others.  Even people who are "cool" and seem to have it all together are struggling.  As humans, we all have insecurities and doubts about ourselves; we worry about how other people perceive us.  We can't make a person or a group of people like us.  Friendships take time.

Jesus would draw all people to himself.  Note the all.  He didn't add "except the nerd from school, except people others looked down upon, except people who don't measure up."  Jesus made no exceptions.  So what can your teen do when they don't feel included by members of a group in which they want to belong?

1. ​Respond to them good naturedly.
2. Pray for them and for other people who seem to be excluded.
3. Reach out to and befriend someone else who is excluded.
4. Welcome others to be part of a new group, but never exclude anyone, even those who have excluded you.
5. Enjoy the friendship of God.

​REFLECT:  Most teens feel like outsiders at some point, but I believe God puts us where we need to be and gives us people we need to be with.  Don't be afraid to discover who you are.  Don't be afraid to change and grow over time.

​ACT ON IT:  Look around for new kids at school who might be having trouble fitting in.  Extend a warm smile, and ask some questions about their hobbies and families.  Create an opportunity for a friendship to begin.

Hi Parents,
​I've been enjoying the Olympics the last couple of weeks and have had fun following Michael Phelps in men's swimming.  According to Fox Sports, "Michael Phelps is the greatest Olympian in history, on the short list for greatest athletes ever and, with every passing race, becomes more like his idol, Michael Jordan."  But Phelps'​ rise to stardom did not come without hard work and perseverance, both physically and emotionally.  Even after winning eight medals in the Beijing Olympics, Phelps says he despised the image of perfection his success had created.  In an interview with Sports Center, Phelps says, "I was just a train wreck.  I was just a time bomb waiting to go off.  No self esteem, no self worth. I was so lost."  How does the most successful swimmer in history have a self esteem problem? 

In 2014, Michael was pulled over for speeding (81 mph in a 55 mph zone) and arrested and charged with his second DUI in 10 years.  Michael was contemplating suicide, but Ray Lewis, former Baltimore Ravens linebacker and friend of Phelps, helped Michael to seek help at a rehabilitation center.  He also gave him a copy of The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren.  The book contained the message Phelps needed to hear:  It's not about accomplishments, it's not about praise.  Life is about God and our need for him.  No Olympic medal can mask the feelings of worthlessness that comes from not knowing God.

​Other Olympians I've watched have also been quick to give God the glory for their success... Laurie Hernandez, Steele Johnson, David Boudia and others.  Instead of being bound by bitterness, they relied heavily on God and prayer during times of tribulation.  I Chronicles 16:8 says "Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done."  ​These athletes have done just that!
​
​Ask your teen...
Who inspires you?  Who sits among the cloud of witnesses cheering as you run the race?
Use your gifts to glorify God, whether your "field" is a pool, court, track, stage, easel, or classroom.

​Prayer...
​Thank you God, for being with us in all our wins and losses, our joys and our sorrows. 
​Amen.

Hi Parents,
​​Looking at the world and laying blame for its problems is easy.  We see the blame game played almost everywhere we go.  Among our families, our friends, our leaders.  Instead of trying to fix the problems, we spend our time trying to decide who's to blame for them.  Both sides think the other side is wrong.  We pass around guilt because we don't want to bear the responsibility.  We can't admit that maybe we're at fault.  Telling ourselves that someone else is to blame for all our troubles is much easier.  Yet fighting about who is wrong doesn't get us anywhere.  It only wastes time and halts any progress we could make toward a solution.  In the end, what matters is not who is to blame, but whether we are willing to recognize the problem and move toward a solution.  How often do we blame other people and hold on to anger until it burns inside of us, making us sick, driving us crazy, and putting tremendous pressure and stress on our lives?  How can we instead, offer a response that is different from "an eye for an eye" or "I'm going to hurt you so you will know how it feels?"

​Mark 11:24-25 reads "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.  And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."  ​Forgiving others is tough work - we've all been there.  But holding on to bitterness is the easy way out.  It means you choose to carry the burden for the rest of your life.  Choosing forgiveness, on the other hand, means choosing freedom.  Thank the Lord, who does not choose the easy way out when we rebel, that He continues to love and forgive and calls us to do the same.

Ephesians 4:31-32 (NRSV) says "Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you." 

Ask your teen...
​Who are you playing the blame game with?
​How important is it to be right?
​Is it difficult to admit when you are to blame?
​Have you blamed God for difficult times in your life or in the life of someone you care about?
​Who or what helped you realize that God had not abandoned you?

​Prayer:
​God, help us to honor you in our relationships with others and to forgive one another generously.  Give us humble hearts to admit when we're wrong and be able to say "I'm sorry" to those we have hurt.  Amen.

Hi Parents,
The great Pablo Picasso was a Spanish painter, sculptor, printmaker, ceramicist, stage designer, poet and playwright.  He was quoted as saying "The meaning of life is to find your gift.  The purpose of life is to give it away."  I like that.  One day last week, before I sat down to write this blog or even knew what the topic would be, I found a small framed picture of that exact quote.  Funny how life intersects like that. But think about it... the words are so simple and yet so profound. Find what you love doing and then give/share it with others.  John Keating, Robin Williams's character in Dead Poets Society, says that the sciences are noble pursuits and necessary to keep the human race alive, but the arts are the reason we stay alive.  Poetry, storytelling, artistry are all expressions of something deep inside of us.  Art is all those emotions mixed up together.  It can be beautiful, sad, or furious.  It can make us laugh or cry.  It can inspire us to change our lives and the world in which we live.  Poetry helps us communicate feelings on a deeper level than simply naming them does.  Art speaks to us in a language all its own, a language that is universally understood.  Whether poetry, a painting, or a good story, art makes us feel alive!

​The book of Psalm is an entire book of poetry, songs and prayers, many of which were written by King David.  King David was the most prolific writer of songs found in the Bible and wrote roughly 75 in this Biblical section.  Other writers include Moses, Solomon, Asaph and the sons or Korah and others. Several of the Psalms come with no credit for the writer.
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The Psalms are full of emotion: coping with fear and loss, searching for God while feeling abandoned and offering praises in joyful song.  As you read the book of Psalms, you will hear believers crying out to God from the depths of despair and you will hear them singing to Him at the heights of celebration.  Many of the passages in Psalms were frequently quoted by Jesus himself.  Psalm 22 is one such example.  David gave an amazingly accurate description of the suffering Jesus would endure hundred of years later. 

Poetry is a beautiful way to express ourselves and to connect with others and God.  When we create a poem, we voice our emotions and thoughts in a way that other people can relate to.  That is the great thing about poetry.  There are no right or wrong answers; a poem is all about you and how you connect to it.

​So here's your challenge this week...
​When you feel yourself overcome with emotion (or sense your child is feeling this way) sit down, open the Bible to Psalms and make the psalmists' words your own.  God intended for us to make the Psalms our own and to find comfort in the psalmist's resolve to trust God no matter what.  Begin by writing a poem/prayer using your favorite scripture passage as a guide and express your faith in the poem/prayer.  It doesn't have to rhyme or be lengthy, just give it a try!  You may be surprised to see what you learn about yourself, others, and God!